Pain
The world can be very
cruel at times but I think its worst cruelty is taking a young life.
May 9, 2013 was the day not only I, but my family and many friends lost someone we had only had the opportunity love for only 17 years and not a day since then has passed that I have not thought about him.
All the ridicule I had received at school for knowing about the situation. I was one of the first to receive the text when he first got to the hospital before we knew he would even make it as long as he was able to and people rudely would ask "How do you know anything about him?" and I reply with "He was my cousin, we grew up closely together."
May 9, 2013 was the day not only I, but my family and many friends lost someone we had only had the opportunity love for only 17 years and not a day since then has passed that I have not thought about him.
All the ridicule I had received at school for knowing about the situation. I was one of the first to receive the text when he first got to the hospital before we knew he would even make it as long as he was able to and people rudely would ask "How do you know anything about him?" and I reply with "He was my cousin, we grew up closely together."
We never talked much at school,
just smiles and waves in the hallway but those late nights at sleepover of
playing board games until five in the morning and one of us falling asleep
first. Whether it were me, him, his sister, or brother.
Usually his sister or the nights we would get the four wheeler and all
load on for a ride... and the countless times I have fallen of the back rack of
the four wheeler. All the times we went swimming together, played in the woods.
You may not physically be with us anymore but you will never be forgotten
. Even to the day I saw you lying lifeless in that harsh box. Hair
slicked back in your Duke Blue Devils shirt. Cheeks and chest hollow, eyes
shut, face colorless. You’d never looked worse. I told you I loved you and how
much I'd miss you but I couldn't bare to do it in one sitting, it was so hard
to look at you and know you weren't going to say something funny back to me
. All the photos of you with friends flashing across the screen with sad
songs in the background. Your friends and our family walking around so grim. I
cried an hour before bed every night straight for nearly two weeks.
Some nights, like tonight, I still do. I love you more than I had ever
told you and I wish I had let you know. But I'm sure you do.
Alana Joy
Copyright 2014
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